Tuesday, April 1, 2014

New Thing Number Twenty-One

I sent a letter to J.K. Rowling. 

Why? Because I was struck with an epiphany. And because I wanted to.

This is what it says:



Ms. Rowling,

            I have been struggling with severe anxiety and depression for quite a while now. Various coping mechanisms, therapy, medications, self-help books, etc. have not helped me in the way I have hoped. However, as I was perusing the Pottermore site, I came upon a remarkable discovery. These are my findings:

Depression is the unfortunate situation that one finds oneself in when a dementor seeks to abide in one's house. Those suffering from depression will find that leaving the house tends to noticeably lift one's mood—at least in a small fraction but generally in a large amount. There are very few reports of dementors following humans, especially muggles, outside of the house. Of course the clearest solution would be to request a witch or wizard to cast a Patronus charm and rid the house of the dementor, but since the implementation of the International Statute of Secrecy in 1692, it has become quite difficult for a muggle to locate a witch or wizard who can perform the Patronus charm. The only known muggle solution to combat dementors—albeit a temporary solution—is chocolate.

For reasons inexplicable to everyone but myself, this epiphany helps me a great deal. Not only do I have the justifiable excuse to eat chocolate, I also feel like I am battling an unseen enemy; now I’m not the problem, the dementor is.

            Although I have fallen to the great misfortune of being a muggle—I waited weeks for my Hogwarts letter, thinking the owl might have been delayed due to altitude sickness—I will start working at once to produce a Patronus charm, or whatever equivalent I can find that is suitable for a muggle. If you have suggestions on how I can accomplish this, I would be eager to hear from you.

            I want to thank you for the wonderful world you have created and for your perfectly rational explanations of seemingly unnatural occurrences. For example, the night I fell asleep chuckling was the night I finally got rid of the boggart under my bed. Non-magical communities around the world have you to thank for improved living conditions, greater peace of mind, and expanded imaginations. I will be forever grateful.

            Thank you again, Ms. Rowling. I wish you well.





                                                            Most Sincerely,

                                                                        Tiana Moe

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